Categories
Cakes

Polenta Cakes, I’ve Got the Shakes… Something Something Bakes

I held off on posting anything yesterday (no one noticed, #sads) because…YOU GUYS! Today’s my three-year blogaversary! Isn’t that…weird? I think the only hobbies I’ve committed to longer were ballet class (6 years) and drumming (going on 15, and I am still no good, #alsosads). The former I was semi-forced into, the latter because…DRUMS! So, thanks. Thanks for getting me here and sticking with me through all the bluest of blue times. I have never not appreciated the kindness I’ve received thanks to this sometimes depressing, always sugar-filled press. Blog bless you all. ❤ polenta The above is a picture of my very first brush with polenta. At least that is what it was referred to as at the sometimes-sketchy diner I often frequented in my home-hood. My buddy and I decided to play dress-up with it instead of, you know, attempting to consume this spongy monstrosity and having it expand inside of one of our persons. Yes, I do have recurring nightmares about such occurrences. No, I have not yet consulted a licensed professional. More on the polenta-part of this party later…. …Because lets deal with the sads first, guys! Where did you think you were, a Reading Rainbow fansite? Silly you.

So yes, I am, duh, once again down in the dumps. I think I know why this time: I’m just finding out that maybe I’ve always been a little bit of a weirdo, and maybe I’ll always be a little bit of a weirdo. Fortunately I have a good little group of people who both tolerate and love the strange bird that I am, but I think I have to come to terms with the fact that not everyone will. I’ve always had trouble really connecting to people in meaningful ways– that’s a gift that I’ve always envied in my loved ones and always coveted for myself. I’m slowly finding that the number of groups I feel like I could be a member of is getting smaller and smaller the older I get. What’s the old Groucho Marx saying? “Who wants to be in a club that would have me as a member?” Indeed, sir. Indeed. I know that sounds dark and strange, but I’m actually starting to feel okay with it. Starting to. I’ve always thought of myself as an introvert anyway, and I think now I’m realizing why that is. Developing lasting, meaningful relationships is difficult enough in life for normal people, and I think I’m very lucky to have held on to the ones that I have.

All of this is my very long-winded way of saying thank you for putting up with the nutjob that I am, friends and loves!

Hoo-kay, now on to the sweet stuff, friends! So, I’ve been wanting to erase the horrible memory of My First Polenta– *shudder*– for years now. I’d finally decided to give the corn-y grain another shot at love when I happened upon a small shop in Brooklyn that sold mini-polenta cakes. Aaaand many stars, rainbows, and professions of unhealthy affection later, I decided to try my hand at baking these myself. The below confections were developed after a LOT of semi-annoying, mostly-delicious testing. Please enjoy.

Raspberry-Lemon Polenta Cakes (makes one dozen mini-cakes)

1 cup of all-purpose flour

3/4 cup of ground polenta

1 tablespoon of baking powder

1 tablespoon of lemon zest

3/4 cup of sugar

1 stick of salted butter, melted and cooled

1/4 cup of extra virgin olive oil

2 eggs, beaten

Juice of one lemon

1 teaspoon vanilla

12 Raspberries, fresh or frozen (if frozen, do not thaw)

Preheat your oven to 350ºF, and line a 12-cup muffin tin with paper liners. In a large bowl, sift together flour, polenta, baking powder, lemon zest and sugar. Stir in butter, olive oil and eggs until batter is smooth. Whisk in lemon juice and vanilla. SONY DSC

SONY DSC
So…stir more than this.

Pour batter evenly into muffin cups (I find that an ice cream scoop helps in this situation). Nestle a raspberry into the middle of each cup until it’s comfy. Yes, seriously. SONY DSC Bake for 35 minutes, rotating the pan halfway, until the cakes have plumped up slightly and take on a golden sheen. Let cool in pan for ten minutes, then remove and let cool completely on wire racks. SONY DSC So these may not look terribly pretty, but BOY did they taste pretty… awesome. My boyfriend ate about three of them in one sitting two days ago, and then when I came home last night there was one left and…MATH! This is not a math blog either. But we loved them. The texture was gritty, crumbly and just purely amazing. Warm and butter them for a breakfast treat that is both not great for you health-wise (probably?) and very great for you emotion-wise (if you’re me?).

Boyfriend's third cake, mid-bite.
Boyfriend’s third cake, mid-bite.

 

Categories
Cakes Chocolate Cheer Classic Favorites Easy Baking Fancy Pantsy No-Bake Recipes

Double The Desserts. Double The Apologies. Double The Pain! Wait…No

I totally woke up yesterday feeling all sorts of blog-related guilt. Guys… what’s my dealio? I abandon this thing that I love, that I’ve come to enjoy doing because… because I’ve been lazy? What gives? Well,  I supposed I’ve been writing-lazy and life-preoccupied. Does that make sense? I hope it does.

What I’m trying to say is I’m sorry I’ve let this blog lay dormant for so long.  I feel like I’m making it sound as if I’m apologizing to myself in a public forum, which seems like a twisted, self-serving public flogging. Aren’t you glad you’re joining me for this?

Props to my boyfriend for this.
Props to my boyfriend for this.

Anyway, I am mad at myself for not writing nearly as much as I have in the past, which is why I’ve decided to throw myself a mini-challenge: For the next two months, I’m going to publish a new post every week, by, at the very latest, that Wednesday. I hope you’ll all either a. keep me accountable by scolding me heavily if I fail to make good on this promise or b. at least not, like, tell me I suck and should never write anything again if I do come through (oh and I do plan to come through, good sirs and madams).

Hell, this might even be the time to have all of you hear my to-do list for the first half of this year. Maybe ya’ll can keep me from lazing out on those too:

1. Go to at least one Prince concert in my life, and preferably in my life this summer

2. Go to Montreal at least once in my life, and preferably in my life this summer

3. OMG OMG OMG you guys Prince is playing a jazz festival. In Montreal. This summer. This maybe shouldn’t be numbered, but is, because…

4. Take more risks in my writing (e.g., numbering things that shouldn’t necessarily be numbered. SCANDALOUS!)

5. Spend less time around bright, flashy screens and more time with other things that haven’t almost completely ruined my eyes, like books and chocolate

6. Cut out sugar

7. Check to see if anyone was paying attention to #6 and hope you are all laughing with me over how ludicrous a resolution that is

8. RETIRE MY SNOW BOOTS FOR A LONG, LONG TIME

Yeah. That last one has hit me, and a lot of us I imagine, pretty hard. I’ve finally accepted that I have a mean case of seasonal affective disorder that nothing short of sunshine, 80-degree weather and giant bowls of ice cream (shut it, that one’s totally necessary) can cure. I think maybe that’s part of what’s been keeping me from updating this blog, or doing anything productive, really. I…hate things right now. Yup, that sounds articulate and sensible. Let’s move on to our DOUBLE DOSE OF DESSERT, shall we?

Indeed I did decide to share two sweet treats in one post, mostly because of the aforementioned guilt over my lack of posting. Let’s get to it, friends!

So dessert #1 was supposed to be one of those ooh-la-la Valentine’s day desserts that would accompany a fancy-schmancy homemade dinner, but V-day’s kinda dumb and also was on a Friday night after a long, lame week, and both of us were dead tired. So instead of presenting it as a romantic dessert, I’m presenting it as portion-controlled chocolate cakes (that you can have two of if you aren’t down with sharing).

Chocolate Lava Cake For Two (makes…uh, two)

adapted from Eva Bakes

1/4 cup of semi-sweet dark chocolate chips

2 tablespoons of softened butter

1/2 cup of confectioner’s sugar

1 egg plus 1 egg yolk, beaten

3 tablespoons of all-purpose flour

1 teaspoon of vanilla

Strawberry ice cream, or NOTHING (or another flavor of ice cream, or berries, or whipped cream. But probably strawberry ice cream)

Preheat your oven to 400ºF and butter two 6-ounce ramekins. In a medium heat-safe bowl over a pot of simmering water, melt chocolate with butter, stirring until chocolate is completely melted (you can also do this in a microwave in 30-second increments, stirring after each session).

Stir in confectioner’s sugar, then beat in eggs and flour, whisking until the batter is smooth.

SONY DSC

Stir in vanilla, then divide batter between your ramekins. Place ramekins on a baking sheet, and send into the oven for 9 to 11 minutes. Make sure to watch these, as they’re done before you think they’re done– the center will still look gooey and jiggly, two very important, official baking terms. Let cool in ramekins for five minutes, then invert onto plates for serving.

Top with strawberry ice cream. I make room for no other option because there should be no other option. Strawberry. Ice. Cream.

SONY DSC

So, if I’m being honest, I didn’t love the way these cakes looked, which is completely on me, for using ramekins that were way too wide, making these look like overdone veggie burgers. However, once we cut into these and liquid chocolate came oozing out, I was SOLD. I didn’t even have time to get a picture of the inside because of how completely freaking sold I was.

Now, for our second dessert of the post (how lucky are YOU), we’re working on something easy, fun and oven-free. Hooray!

So, apparently for people who are not Indian people, popcorn balls are a classic sweet treat. This is what my boyfriend, who is not Indian people, tells me, at least. Can anyone chime in on this? Is it like me saying that halwah and papadam should be staples in every American household?

Anyway, I decided to surprise him by trying my hand at this “classic treat” because I am generous and also can never turn down the opportunity to combine three most excellent ingredients: butter, sugar, and popcorn. Let’s get “classic!”

Popcorn Balls (makes 6 baseball-sized balls)

adapted from CHOW

9 cups of plain popped popcorn, seeds removed, unless you hate having teeth

1 cup of turbinado sugar (you can use regular white sugar, but I love the deep flavor this imparts)

1/3 cup of light corn syrup

1/3 cup of water

1 teaspoon of white vinegar

1/2 stick (4 tablespoons) of salted butter, cut into pieces

1/2 teaspoon of vanilla

Grease a large glass bowl, and place popcorn in it. Set aside.

Large glass bowl. Popcorn. Creative captioning.
Large glass bowl. Popcorn. Creative captioning. World’s Finest Chocolate wrapper because I am nostalgic. Jar of peanut butter for me to snack on whilst “working.”

In a medium-sized saucepan, combine sugar, corn syrup, water and vinegar; stir to combine. Place pan over high heat, and cook– stirring constantly– until sugar is dissolved. Bring mixture to a boil and cook until it registers at 260ºF on a candy thermometer (if you don’t have one, don’t fret, just cook the mixture for 5 to 7 minutes). Remove from heat, then stir in butter and vanilla. 

Quickly pour hot sugar mixture over popcorn, using a rubber spatula to spread the mixture evenly over the popcorn. Stir until the mixture is just cool enough to handle with bare hands, about three minutes. Seriously, these are good, but not burn-your-palms good. I don’t know what would be burn-your-palms good. I have some ideas, though. None are suitable for this blog.

With oiled hands, grab a chunk of popcorn and mash together, compressing popcorn into a ball. Let balls cool completely on parchment paper. *Giggle*

SONY DSC

Ok…these were good. If they really are a classic treat, I can totally understand why. They’re buttery, salty/sweet, and somehow miraculously melt almost as soon as a bite hits your tongue. This dessert’s been a repeat offender in our home, half because my boyfriend is sentimental and half because we’re sugar fiends. I actually think it’s probably 78% because we’re sugar fiends, but it’s six popcorn balls in one hand and a half-dozen in the other. Or something. See you next week!

Categories
Cakes Fancy Pantsy Grown Up People Desserts Holiday desserts

Crippling Anxiety…Oh And Pumpkin Cake…Oh And Hi Again, Guys

This is what my apartment currently looks like. It's been a week and a half since we moved in. Maybe this will explain the following paragraphs.
This is what our apartment currently looks like. It’s been a week and a half since we moved in. Maybe this will explain the following paragraphs.

I hesitated before ever stepping virtual foot on (in?) this blog again. It’s not that I hate it, or you, or baking. Quite the opposite on all points, in fact. I just sort of hate me right now. Allow me to explain.

So… wait. Now I’m not sure I want to explain. Too bad I’ve already started typing. It’s not like there’s a delete option or anything. Hashtag sarcasm? I didn’t do that correctly did I?

Okay. Here goes. I have seriously bad anxiety. I always have, but I think maybe it was something I just didn’t really feel like ever acknowledging, not because there’s anything wrong with anxiety in and of itself, but I have a whole other grab-bag of problems that have all already conspired to eff with me. I don’t know that my overloaded brain could have handled accepting this crap as well. But anyway, anxiety. Bad. Always. I used to bawl in class, outside of class, on the way home from school, if I got anything less than an A on a test. The day I got a ZERO on an Advanced Mathematics test in the fifth grade I hyperventilated so badly that I think my father avoided me for hours after I returned home, not because he was angry, but because HE was scared of ME and what my weird, crazy, totally unhealthy reaction would be. I’ve put myself in the emergency room with panic attacks like three times, I’ve cried over minor mistakes at work, and I’ve spilled boiling-hot tea over myself because my hands were shaking too badly to properly hold the cup. I have the scar to prove it. I’m ridiculous.

Uh-oh! Hilario.
Uh-oh! Hilario.

All of that is extremely humiliating to type. But since my last post, there have been a lot, and I mean a LOT of events that have caused major freak-outs on my part and possibly made other people want to slyly inject me with elephant quaaludes to S me TFU. I feel like a ton of major happenings have caused me to face all of the negative feelings I’ve ever had about myself– from my birthday to our big move into a new apartment to quite a few people I love taking major steps in their lives while I’m worried about where the f*%k to find cheap Space Bags for a bunch of unnecessary crap. Can you feel the anxious, readers?

So now I’m sitting here wondering why I typed all of that out. Hm. Well. I…don’t know? I think a part of me just wants a hug and some understanding and for people to tell me that, no, everyone does not hate me and wish ill on me (a thought that I inexplicably and irrationally carry around with me on a daily basis), and that yes, things will eventually get better. Please just don’t tell me to calm the frig down. That’s like telling a 3 year old not to eat the raw chocolate batter. I’ll eat the batter.

I am sure that not baking for OVER A MONTH (!) has contributed to my current state. Boxes and boxes of still-packed items be damned, I am ignoring you in favor of the baking ingredients I miraculously found before anything else (including my toothbrush ;)). Pumpkin cake (because AUTUMN) in a mason jar (because I unpacked those and it sounded cool), let’s be friends.

Pumpkin cake In A Jar (I made two pint-size jars. You could use the same ingredients and fit these into four pint-size jars, but since I like living on the edge I really packed the batter in there)

adapted from Serious Eats

1/3 cup of butter, softened

1/2 cup plus 2 tablespoons white sugar

1/2 cup plus 2 tablespoons brown sugar

2 large eggs

1 cup pumpkin puree

1/3 cup of water

1 1/2 cups of all-purpose flour

1/4 teaspoon of baking powder

1/2 teaspoon of salt

1/2 teaspoon of ground cloves

1/2 teaspoon cinnamon

1 cup chocolate chips, optional and super worth it

Preheat the oven to 325ºF and grease as many jars of varying sizes as you’d like to use. You can basically use any glass jar you have, but I picked pint-sized ones because they’re gigantic and I believe in generous/unrealistic single-serve portions.

Cream the butter by hand or using an electric mixer until fluffy, then add in sugars until smooth. Beat eggs in, one at a time, until fully incorporated. Stir in the pumpkin puree and water, and set aside.

In a large bowl, stir together flour, baking powder, salt and spices. Add dry mixture to the pumpkin mixture, stirring until completely combined. Add in chocolate chips if desired.

I swear I mixed this completely, just wanted to get a picture before my battery died and... I'm an excellent blogger.
I swear I mixed this completely, just wanted to get a picture before my battery died and… I’m an excellent blogger.

Pour batter evenly into jars– and keep lids and rings OFF while baking. The original recipe says to fill jars a bit more than halfway, which I would now agree with, even though I just straight up disobeyed this order when I made mine. So…don’t be alarmed by the pictures. Place either on a baking sheet or directly on oven rack, carefully, and bake for 30 minutes if you’re using tiny jars and 45 minutes if you’re using pint-size jars (use your judgment for sizes in between. For example, start watching 8-ounce jars around the 35-minute mark for doneness).

Remove from oven and let cool. If you’re not eating the cakes right away (or you’re a nice person and want to gift these to a special someone), place a square of wax paper around the top of each cake, then place lids on jars. Otherwise, just have at them mercilessly.

One of these is a blue mason jar. I felt like that needed to be stated.
One of these is a blue mason jar. I felt like that needed to be stated.

Thoughts? I mean…fancy! If I were so inclined, I’d certainly make these again, fill them just enough to close them, and ship them off to my favorite people. Expect to see more of this type of dessert here, if you can stomach all of the emo emo emo that will precede it. 😉

Categories
Cakes Classic Favorites Fancy Pantsy

Do Not Yell Fire In A Crowded Theatre. Do Yell Fire When You Set Your Cake Aflame.

Yeah…so we’ll get to that.

Originally my next post was going to be about buttermilk panna cotta. It’s easy, delicious and because I’m cray cray I like to write about things just after I’ve made them. I think it’s because I’m afraid that if I skip the panna cotta post and go directly to writing about the thing I made after it the panna cotta will re-form in my fridge, let itself out and coagulate all over my sleeping body. That is creepy, crazy, weird and disgusting and I deeply apologize.

I think I sort of just forgot about the panna cotta since I made it so long ago and have been slacking on posts. Then, a few weeks later during an adventurous trip to Duane Reade (we all have those, don’t we New Yorkers?), I decided to purchase some seasonal mistakes called Pumpkin Hershey’s Kisses. They were, as I sort of suspected, horrible. I keep a chocolate drawer at work, and pretty much everyone who opens it to grab something sweet gives these things the evil side eye and walks away. The drawer glowed orange until I decided to take these things home and try to work with them in thumbprint cookies. The result is below (please shield your eyes/the eyes of your children if you’re prudish or too young for this):

SONY DSC

Boob cookies. I had accidentally made boob cookies. And once I realized what my baked treats were beginning to look like, I tried to add some variety by shoving mini-Snickers bars onto some cookies and averting my eyes very quickly and quietly. No matter, as the cookies still came out looking….like they looked. They also kind of sucked. No pun intended. Oh dear.

Whew. Well. Now that that’s out of the way, let’s move on to our star dessert, shall we? So this past Sunday was my birthday, and since I am kind of nerdy and like to bake things that I probably have no business baking, I decided to tackle making my own birthday cake. This is not sad or pathetic, but is instead empowering, fun, and super dangerous (more on that later). Let us begin.

S’mores Cake (because we don’t play)

adapted from Serious Eats

For the cake

1 cup of unsalted butter, softened, plus more for greasing pan

2 1/4 cups of all-purpose flour

1/3 cup of cornstarch

2 teaspoons of cinnamon

4 1/2 teaspoons of baking powder

1/2 teaspoon of salt

1 3/4 cups of superfine sugar

2 teaspoons of vanilla extract OR 2 teaspoons of coffee liqueur (I used the latter and highly recommend)

4 medium or 3 large eggs

1 1/4 cups of milk

For the Chocolate Ganache Filling

3 ounces of finely chopped dark chocolate

1/2 cup of heavy cream

3 teaspoons of light brown sugar

For the Swiss Meringue

2/3 cup of egg whites

2 cups of superfine sugar

Preheat your oven to 350ºF and grease and line three 8-inch round cake pans with parchment paper (or, if you don’t have these, you can use a 10-inch springform pan instead and end up spending more than twice as much time in front of your oven like I did. I would not recommend this). In a medium bowl, sift together your flour, cornstarch, cinnamon, baking powder and salt and set aside.

Place butter in a large bowl, and using an electric mixer on high speed, whip butter until smooth. Add in sugar and beat until light and fluffy, which should take about 5 minutes. Add vanilla if you want and if you have it. If you don’t, might I recommend this? :

SONY DSC

I have what can only be described as a deep appreciation for this yummy liqueur. It’s just beautiful, and will work wonders in this cake. Anyway, yeah, totally add this in if you have any on hand. Then, with your mixer at medium speed, add eggs one at a time, beating after each addition, until fully mixed.

Now, with mixer on low, alternate between adding in the flour mixture and adding in the milk, beginning and ending with the flour mixture. Pour evenly into pans and bake for 30 to 35 minutes, until the cake is golden brown and springs back lightly when touched. Cool the cakes in their pans for 10 minutes, then allow to cool completely on wire racks.

Now, let’s take a break from instructions for a hot second so I can tell you a little bit about my process. As I mentioned, I did not have enough pans to make a three-layer cake. So, genius that I am, I decided to use one very deep springform pan and divide the cake into layers myself once it baked. This basically tacked on about 45 extra minutes to my baking time, and freaked me out so immensely that I ran away from the cake and let my boyfriend do the separating.

I think it's pretty funny that he's basically treating this thing like a wheel of cheese. Also, this method will leave you with two layers, not three.
I think it’s pretty funny that he’s basically treating this thing like a wheel of cheese. Also, this method will leave you with two layers, not three.

Boyfriend also noticed that I was so stressed out about this cake– like a total freaking weirdo, I know– that I wasn’t breathing, and sent me away from the kitchen for a good twenty minutes. I don’t know why I told you that. I just did. Problems. They are mine.

Now, let’s work on that ganache, shall we? It’s very, very simple. Place chocolate in a small, heat-proof bowl and set aside. Place heavy cream and brown sugar in a small saucepan over medium heat and bring just to a boil. Remove from heat and immediately pour over chocolate. Let mixture stand for a couple of minutes, then gently stir everything together until the mixture becomes glossy. Chill until slightly thickened and cooled, but not set.

SONY DSC

Spread the ganache across the tops of all three layers. If you happen to have graham cracker crumbs or cookie crumbs from boob cookies you made and hated, I’d recommend sprinkling these on top of the ganache. Set aside and get ready to make some meringue.

SONY DSC

SONY DSC

To make your meringue, place egg whites and sugar in a large heatproof bowl and set over a pan of simmering water. Whisk constantly until the sugar dissolves and the egg whites are warm. Remove from heat and, with an electric mixer, whip the egg whites until stiff peaks form. Once you’ve made your meringue, make sure to work quickly with it, as it begins to stiffen up pretty fast.

SONY DSC

To assemble, place one layer of cake down on a cake plate and spread the top with meringue. Stack the second layer on top, repeat, and finish with third layer. Then, spread meringue all over sides and top of cake until completely covered. No need to make this look pretty, since it probably already kind of does with all of the meringue-peaks.

Now, once you’ve covered the cake, you can lightly brown it using a blowtorch or try to set the whole friggin’ top of it on fire by using your oven’s broiler like I did.

Okay. Let me explain. So I’d decided to try using the broiler because I’d read multiple reputable sources stating that this was the best way to get an even, light browning all over a meringue. That’s probably true, only I somehow did not realize that setting the top of the cake so close to the broiler would result in the cake becoming a fire pit. And I was watching the damn thing through the oven window like a hawk. Fires happen quickly. 😦

Fortunately, my boyfriend and I salvaged the cake before any real damage was done. He began picking burnt pieces off of the top and eating them happily. I joined in because I was sad and had decided to eat all of my feelings. Mercifully not too much damage was done to the cake….even if it did end up with a face only its baker could love:

That thing on top should be an elephant, but what about this cake has been perfect thus far?
That thing on top should be an elephant, but what about this cake has been perfect thus far?

So yes, I was a bit down over having set my cake on fire. My mood, however, picked up a few hours later when my lovely BF surprised me with dinner and drinks with my sister and best friends, who all really loved this cake. And not, like, pity love. Like second and third helpings and doggie bags full of to-go pieces love.

Yes, yes I was slightly inebriated when I cut this cake.
Yes, yes I was slightly inebriated when I cut this cake.

I’m still picking at what I managed to save. And believe it or not, I think I may have found my favorite cake in this thing. All in all, a wonderful birthday. Thank you, lovely people ❤

Categories
Cakes Classic Favorites Cookies

I’ve Been a Puppet, a Pauper, a Pirate, uh, an Oatmeal Raisin Cookie Pie

I picked this because asi es la vida! Subtitulos Espanol!

First, I really want to thank everyone for the messages of concern, the hugs and, yes, even the “WTF WHY DIDN’T YOU TELL ME?!?!” scoldings after my last post. I’m totally fine, albeit still just the tiniest bit annoyed/shaken up, but it was really surprising and touching to realize how many people were concerned for me. Thanks for caring, homies! I love you, too!

So I’ve tried to stop airing out all my drama and problems on social media, because I’m private and it’s boring and I’d much rather use Facebook to ask for book recommendations and post delightfully nerdy stuff like this. But I guess this is kind of social media too, right? In my mind, since I am both a grump and currently a hermit, this blog is more anti-social media. That sort of justifies, for me at least, all the whining I do on this thing. Feel me? Hope so, because I’m feeling complain-y!

A couple of weeks ago, I went to Vermont, ignored all my many health problems, and climbed a friggin’ mountain. Ok, we hiked  the thing, but it was still pretty damn scary, especially toward the cold, windy top, where I almost lost a precious Mets cap and my balance. Notice how I mention the hat first. Priorities, kids.

Yes, that's me beneath the oversized hoodie and mess of curly craziness.
Yes, that’s me beneath the oversized hoodie and mess of curly craziness.

Anyway, I think I’ve mentioned about a bajillion and one times that I have moderate-to-severe asthma, and I think I’ve also maybe mentioned that sometimes I try to pretend I don’t and hike mountains. That’s how things like chest pains, panic attacks and altitude sickness happen, methinks.

Ok, only the chest pains occurred right after descent. The other two came in the days after our trip to the Green Mountain State. My very, very wise decision to go straight up and straight down the highest point in Vermont, combined with my lack of proper hydration and general moronic tendencies have led to a couple of weeks of dizziness, loopy-ness (more than usual, yes, thank you for asking) and sadness. I’ve been trying to get a doctor’s appointment just to make sure something didn’t fly into my ear on a peak and that I don’t literally have rocks for brains now, but my appointments keep getting cancelled by the office. The service I book through, however, has offered me an Amazon gift card for my troubles. Free monies guys! Priorities!

All of this sickness has been helped along by a really, really difficult week that’s left me wondering what…well, what the hell. I hate to be all me, me, me on this thing (that’s an invitation for any good news from you, readers… I’d love to celebrate some happy stuff on the blog!), but, well, life’s been tough on me lately. I mean, you can do everything possible to try to make your life a positive, happy, fulfilling one, and then something completely out of your control can come along and make you want to give all that positivity the finger. That’s life, right Mr. Sinatra?

Anyway, baking because sad, comforting recipe,easy deliciousness, on and on, you know the drill, please let’s just do this.

Oatmeal Raisin Cookie Pie (makes one 9-inch round pie)

adapted from Serious Eats

For the pie

3/4 cup of all-purpose flour

1 teaspoon of ground cinnamon

1/2 teaspoon of salt

1/2 teaspoon of baking soda

1 1/2 cups of old-fashioned oats

1 stick of softened butter

1/2 cup of brown sugar

1/4 cup of granulated white sugar

1 egg

1 teaspoon of vanilla

1/2 cup of raisins

For the icing

1/3 cup of confectioners’ sugar

1 tablespoon + 1 teaspoon of heavy cream

Preheat your oven to 350ºF and grease either a 9-inch springform pan or pie plate.

In a medium bowl, sift together flour, cinnamon, salt, baking soda and oats, and set aside. In the bowl of a stand mixer or using a hand mixer, cream together butter and sugars until smooth. Beat in egg and vanilla, then add in dry ingredients and mix just until combined. Gently fold in raisins.

SONY DSC

SONY DSC

Spread batter into pan and use a rubber spatula to flatten and even out the top as much as possible. Bake until the top is golden brown, about 20 to 25 minutes. Let pie cool in pan for 5 minutes before releasing. Let cool completely.

SONY DSC

Now, on to the super-easy icing. In a small bowl, stir together confectioners’ sugar and heavy cream until you reach the desired consistency. Drizzle atop the pie, in any fashion you’d like. I poured the icing into a small sandwich bag and snipped a corner off to drizzle, since I don’t trust the fashion I’d like.

SONY DSC

Pretty, right? It was also yum. AND I cut down the sugar quite a bit and it was STILL yum. I swear. I even got confirmation from two kids (who cannot tell a lie, I’ve been told). One exclaimed “I LOVE it” several times before going for extra helpings, and one announced “It’s bad,” in between large bites and before also going for a second helping. That’s life.