Sad Shibow

New Year, New Me. Just Kidding, I’m Still Grumpy and Indian.

Post author By Shibow
Post date January 1, 2014
No Comments on New Year, New Me. Just Kidding, I’m Still Grumpy and Indian.

AND I STILL LOVE SUGAR. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!

Guys, I have been on a steady diet of cookies, maple syrup, chocolate chip Belgian waffles, peanut butter and Neuhaus chocolates since, like, I don’t even know when. I’ve lost all sense of time. I can’t grasp simple concepts anymore. Which one is the minute hand and which one is the hour hand? What’s a deductible? Can someone teach me how to properly use my Twitter? I can teach you how to Dougie in return.

elfeating — Me for the past few weeks. Except without the hat. That’s the only difference.

All of these problems are, very likely, sugar-induced. And I just don’t give a damn. Eventually I’ll probably wake up and start force-feeding myself whole grains and bell peppers again, but for now I’ll just stick to congratulating myself on begrudgingly taking down daily glasses of V-8 [with my aforementioned Belgian waffles].

So anyway, HAPPY NEW YEAR! 2014– wild, right? Maybe? I’m personally hoping it’s a much calmer year than the last. Here’s to a(n) emergency room/ulcer/scary crazy folk/general overall disaster and tragedy-free year for ALL of us, people! I really do wish you all the very best and cannot thank you enough for continuing to read and like this blog. One of my best friends touched my heart and made me tear up a little when he thanked me for my last post, in which I talked about the importance of celebration and gratitude. Moments like that are exactly what keep me celebrating and keep me grateful. So here’s to popping the literal or figurative bubbly all crazy year, loves.

And if you need a little something to accompany all of that Cristal, why not try these easy-peasy cookies? FIVE ingredients, a MILLION fans. Maybe not a million. In my case it was like twenty. But that’s because I only gave these to twenty people. That’s a 100% success rating, so it might as well be a million people. Feel me? Let’s make some easy meringues.

White and Dark Chocolate Chip Meringues (makes about 30 cookies)

3 large egg whites at room temperature

1/2 cup of granulated white sugar

1 teaspoon of vanilla extract

1/2 cup of white chocolate chips

1/2 cup of dark chocolate chips

Preheat your oven to 300°F and cover a large cookie sheet with parchment paper.

Using a hand mixer or stand mixer, beat egg whites on high until soft peaks begin to form. I think I’ve mentioned this before, but I’m going to stress it again: it is super important to be working with clean, dry instruments when making a meringue. I am not calling you gross or anything, but even the slightest bit of moisture can ruin a meringue. When you’re happy with your peaks, gradually add in sugar, a little bit at a time, then beat in vanilla until your peaks are very stiff.

The peaks should be so stiff that you’re able to hold the bowl almost completely upside-down without having any of your batter budge. Do this slowly if you’d really like to test it, and if the batter starts to slide down, keep beating. When you’re satisfied, gently fold in your chocolate chips.

Drop the mixture by tablespoon onto your cookie sheets. It’s easiest to use two, like this:

You can keep the cookies fairly close together since they won’t really spread. Bake for 35 to 45 minutes, or just until the cookies are slightly browned and don’t look shiny. Mine took about 37 minutes to get there.

Cute, right? And I’m betting that if you’re a sugar fiend like I am you probably have all of the ingredients on hand. ALSO these aren’t terribly bad for you– no butter, oil or egg yolks necessary! I think I may have accidentally convinced multiple people that this was a health food. Don’t do that. Especially since these taste anything but healthy.

They’re crunchy on the outside, with a light, dreamy-creamy inside. Given that these are one-bowl-baking cookies, and given that there are so few ingredients, there really aren’t any excuses not to make them. Unless you’ve already had too much sugar. Um…but even then….

Tags easy meringues, meringues, one-bowl baking, white and dark chocolate chip meringues

Cheesecakes Do's and Don'ts Muffins Stuff Your Parents Would Like

Leggo My Holiday Depression. That Was Bad. It’s A Post About Waffle Cookies.

Post author By Shibow
Post date December 17, 2013
1 Comment on Leggo My Holiday Depression. That Was Bad. It’s A Post About Waffle Cookies.

Guys. I am so unmotivated that yesterday I decided to randomly take an IQ test to see how much dumber I’ve gotten over the years. Guess what? I’m not dumber at all! I’m smarter by a FULL POINT! And according to the scale, I’m “gifted but too freaking lazy and unmotivated and whiny to do a damn thing about it.” That’s an actual quote from the test! No it’s not! But it might as well be! So, it would be very easy to take the results of that test and beat the crap out of myself. It would, in fact, be the easiest thing. But I’ve slowly started to realize a few things. Maybe it’s the holiday season that’s warmed my cold heart. Maybe it’s the free Glen Hansard show that I creepily found out about and subsequently attended (it was life-changing and mind-blowing, thanks for asking!). Maybe it’s just maturity…but probably not that, since about an hour ago I had a long, angry conversation with my younger sister over a grudge I’ve been holding against a relative who dismembered my Zack Morris doll when he was five. The Zack Morris doll has been replaced. The emotions have not.

This is our Christmas tree. It may not seem like much, but it brings me a disturbing amount of joy.

I think this is the time to try and live life as fully as it can possibly be lived. I’m not going to get any younger than I am right this second, so I think it’s time to just will myself to start. I have a habit of waiting– waiting for things to get better, for life to get less stressful, for more money to come in, for my life to measure up to the lives of others, for the fun to just start already. And thanks to that terrible habit, I know I have missed out on some great things. I once read that it’s really, really important to celebrate every good thing that happens to you, because once it’s gone, it’s gone, and you won’t have any way to remember how wonderful you felt if you don’t take even just a moment to be grateful, be surprised, and be happy. So I’m going to try to stop and celebrate every now and then. I figure that I spend so much time and energy complaining (91 posts and counting, guys! How are you all still reading this blog?), that I have some to devote to trying to be happy. I hope you’ll all join me, or at least try to. You know what would help? Waffle cookies. Waffle cookies would help for so many reasons. The first reason is they consist of three of the most awesome things known to man and woman: waffles, cookies, and chocolate. If there is a better triple threat to be found, tell me. But for now, let’s work!

Chocolate Chip Waffle Cookies (makes one dozen cookies)

adapted from How to Simplify

1/2 cup of brown sugar

2 tablespoons of white sugar (omit if you want a deeper flavor)

1/2 cup of butter, melted (browned if you want a nuttier flavor, which I did)

1 large egg

1 teaspoon of vanilla extract

1 cup plus 2 tablespoons of all-purpose flour

1/4 teaspoon of baking soda

1/2 cup of chocolate chips

Confectioner’s sugar, for dusting (optional)

Now, grease and preheat your waffle iron. If you do not have a waffle iron, please purchase one immediately. It will change your life in only the best ways. Combine your sugar, butter, egg and vanilla and stir until mixed. Stir in flour and baking soda and continue until batter forms. Fold in chocolate chips, then drop batter onto iron by the tablespoon. Close iron, and heat for about 1 1/2 to 2 minutes, until the cookies are a golden brown. Very gently lift cookies using tongs, and place on wire racks to cool. Dust with confectioner’s sugar if you’d like. Now, if you have a waffle iron, these will be ridiculously easy. If you do not, these will be impossible, so I’m very sorry and I’d be happy to drop some off at your place if you’d like. Really, I would, because these are so easy and fast and make other people very, very happy. I brought these to work as part of a holiday bucket o’ cookies, and two separate people have asked me to make them again. Now that’s something to celebrate. Speaking of celebrate, I hope you’ll all join me in supporting a good cause this holiday season. No Kid Hungry is a wonderful organization that provides hot meals for children across the country. Did you know that 1 in 5 American children lives in poverty? Twenty percent!!! That breaks my heart. If you can, please donate. If you can’t, please share the link, and either way, have a lovely, lovely holiday season.

Tags chocolate chip waffle cookies, fast cookies, no bake cookies, waffle cookies

Classic Favorites Holiday desserts Uncategorized

Rugelach. Pumpkin. Pie. Rugelach. And… All The Feelings.

Post author By Shibow
Post date November 27, 2013
No Comments on Rugelach. Pumpkin. Pie. Rugelach. And… All The Feelings.

First off, I’d like to put out a huge thank you/sorry/thank you to everyone who read and understood (or, hey, didn’t quite understand) my previous post. Anxiety is an embarrassing thing to admit in any realm, I think, even though it shouldn’t be, because pretty much everyone has had those momentary fits of panic at one time or another. I just happen to have them at all the time or another. As I explained to my very understanding boyfriend, I operate at a seven (out of a possible eleven. Eleven for no reason. Also for Spinal Tap). Sometimes I go below that, but that’s pretty much my baseline. And I recognize that that’s not the best but… it’s me. So like me, please, tightened jaw, shaky fists, watery eyes and all. Or don’t. It’s cool (ohmygodeighteighteightI’mataneight).
So, anyway, now, let’s move on to something great: Thanksgiving! So, yes, there’s been a lot of garbage this year. In my life. In all of our lives, I’m sure. (If you live a garbage-less life, then, well, you’re probably not having any fun here and should probably go Youtube some Yanni or something. That was pretty much the best diss I could come up with.) There is, though, likely more lovely things to be happy about and grateful for than we realize. I’m grateful to still be writing this blog and still have new people tell me they read it. I mean… I really can’t tell you all how oddly wonderful that is. I think I spend so much time thinking I’m just a nobody posting about what a messy “baker” I am that I forget people sometimes enjoy this stuff. Thanks, you. I’m also grateful for the people who motivate me to keep operating (even if it’s at a seven) daily. You know who you are and you know that I love you.

Now that we’ve gotten that squared away, let’s talk about pumpkin. Ya’ll know I’m on a kick given the month and the season, so there are no surprises there. Also, Thanksgiving this year and the first day of Hanukkah fall on the same day, and since I love eating absolutely everything always, I thought it would be a splendid idea to work with a recipe that combines both holidays, because genius.

Pumpkin Pie Rugelach

adapted from Serious Eats (I swear I’m creative and look elsewhere for recipes, but I love these folks)

For the crust

2 cups of all-purpose flour

4 tablespoons of sugar

2 teaspoons of cinnamon

1/4 teaspoon of cloves

1/4 teaspoon of ginger

1/4 teaspoon of allspice

2 sticks (or 1 cup) of cold butter, cut into 1-inch chunks

8 ounces of cold cream cheese, cut into 1-inch chunks

For filling/coating

1 cup of pumpkin butter (I used Trader Joe’s brand)

4 tablespoons of chopped walnuts or pecans (I used pecans)*

1 egg, beaten

Cinnamon sugar (1 teaspoon of cinnamon + 1/4 cup of sugar)

*If you’d like to make these nut-free, you can! Chop up roasted pumpkin seeds and use instead :).

Now, you’ll want to keep the butter and cream cheese as cold as possible throughout this process to allow for the flakiest crust possible. Keep that in mind, homies.

In a medium-sized bowl, whisk together flour, sugar and spices and set aside. Now, in the bowl of a stand mixer or in a large bowl and using a hand mixer, beat together butter and cream cheese just until smooth. Pour in your dry ingredients and mix just until you start to see curds form and hold together. Take the dough out, divide it in half, and wrap each half in plastic wrap. Refrigerate for at least 2 hours.

Now, to assemble these babies. Lightly flour a large, and I mean large, surface. Gently roll out one piece of dough to about 1/4-inch thickness. Try not to do this on a surface directly above a working dishwasher, as that sh*t gets hot and will really screw with your dough. Just saying, not like that happened.

Anyway, form a large rectangle (9×13″ if possible), then spread dough with 1/2 cup of pumpkin butter and sprinkle with nuts of your choosing. Roll up from the short end, into a long log.

I realize that these look like the kind of monstrosity that Chipotle tries to pass of as a healthy meal. But I'm just messy. — I realize that these look like the kind of monstrosity that Chipotle tries to pass of as a healthy meal. But I’m just messy.

Cut into 1-inch wide pieces and transfer to a baking sheet. Repeat this process with your other half of dough. Cover with plastic wrap and chill for about 30 minutes.

Now, preheat your oven to 350ºF. Brush each piece with egg wash, then liberally sprinkle with cinnamon sugar. Bake until golden and puffy, about 25 minutes. Let cool for 5 minutes in pan, then let cool completely on wire racks.

I should mention that at first my rugelach didn’t come out as flaky as I’d hoped. I actually needed to toast them at 400º for an additional ten minutes to achieve the consistency I was going for. This annoyed me greatly, and I started out basically hating these things.

Then I bit into one. And then I let my boyfriend bite into one. And then I brought some to work.

Mmmm. Yeah. It took some convincing to eat one after I got pissed off and gave up on Thanksgiving (it’s this annual thing I do before I inevitably change my mind and bake nine thousand more things), but then it took convincing to stop eating them, presumably because my boyfriend cares about my health wanted them all to himself. Work people also devoured them, which is kinda really nice. If you’ve got the time and enough cold surfaces on which to make these, go for it.

Whatever you decide, have a lovely Thanksgiving. Thank you for putting up with me for all of this time. ❤

Tags Pumpkin rugelach, rugelach, thanksgiving 2015

Classic Favorites Holiday desserts Uncategorized

Rugelach. Pumpkin. Pie. Rugelach. And… All The Feelings.

Post author By Shibow
Post date November 27, 2013
No Comments on Rugelach. Pumpkin. Pie. Rugelach. And… All The Feelings.

So, anyway, now, let’s move on to something great: Thanksgiving! So, yes, there’s been a lot of garbage this year. In my life. In all of our lives, I’m sure. (If you live a garbage-less life, then, well, you’re probably not having any fun here and should probably go Youtube some Yanni or something. That was pretty much the best diss I could come up with.) There is, though, likely more lovely things to be happy about and grateful for than we realize. I’m grateful to still be writing this blog and still have new people tell me they read it. I mean… I really can’t tell you all how oddly wonderful that is. I think I spend so much time thinking I’m just a nobody posting about what a messy “baker” I am that I forget people sometimes enjoy this stuff. Thanks, you. I’m also grateful for the people who motivate me to keep operating (even if it’s at a seven) daily. You know who you are and you know that I love you.

Pumpkin Pie Rugelach

adapted from Serious Eats (I swear I’m creative and look elsewhere for recipes, but I love these folks)

For the crust

2 cups of all-purpose flour

4 tablespoons of sugar

2 teaspoons of cinnamon

1/4 teaspoon of cloves

1/4 teaspoon of ginger

1/4 teaspoon of allspice

2 sticks (or 1 cup) of cold butter, cut into 1-inch chunks

8 ounces of cold cream cheese, cut into 1-inch chunks

For filling/coating

1 cup of pumpkin butter (I used Trader Joe’s brand)

4 tablespoons of chopped walnuts or pecans (I used pecans)*

1 egg, beaten

Cinnamon sugar (1 teaspoon of cinnamon + 1/4 cup of sugar)

*If you’d like to make these nut-free, you can! Chop up roasted pumpkin seeds and use instead :).

Now, you’ll want to keep the butter and cream cheese as cold as possible throughout this process to allow for the flakiest crust possible. Keep that in mind, homies.

Anyway, form a large rectangle (9×13″ if possible), then spread dough with 1/2 cup of pumpkin butter and sprinkle with nuts of your choosing. Roll up from the short end, into a long log.

Cut into 1-inch wide pieces and transfer to a baking sheet. Repeat this process with your other half of dough. Cover with plastic wrap and chill for about 30 minutes.

Then I bit into one. And then I let my boyfriend bite into one. And then I brought some to work.

Mmmm. Yeah. It took some convincing to eat one after I got pissed off and gave up on Thanksgiving (it’s this annual thing I do before I inevitably change my mind and bake nine thousand more things), but then it took convincing to stop eating them, presumably because my boyfriend ~~cares about my health~~ wanted them all to himself. Work people also devoured them, which is kinda really nice. If you’ve got the time and enough cold surfaces on which to make these, go for it.

Whatever you decide, have a lovely Thanksgiving. Thank you for putting up with me for all of this time. ❤

Tags Pumpkin rugelach, rugelach

Cakes Fancy Pantsy Grown Up People Desserts Holiday desserts

Crippling Anxiety…Oh And Pumpkin Cake…Oh And Hi Again, Guys

Post author By Shibow
Post date November 13, 2013
No Comments on Crippling Anxiety…Oh And Pumpkin Cake…Oh And Hi Again, Guys

This is what my apartment currently looks like. It's been a week and a half since we moved in. Maybe this will explain the following paragraphs. — This is what our apartment currently looks like. It’s been a week and a half since we moved in. Maybe this will explain the following paragraphs.

I hesitated before ever stepping virtual foot on (in?) this blog again. It’s not that I hate it, or you, or baking. Quite the opposite on all points, in fact. I just sort of hate me right now. Allow me to explain.

So… wait. Now I’m not sure I want to explain. Too bad I’ve already started typing. It’s not like there’s a delete option or anything. Hashtag sarcasm? I didn’t do that correctly did I?

Okay. Here goes. I have seriously bad anxiety. I always have, but I think maybe it was something I just didn’t really feel like ever acknowledging, not because there’s anything wrong with anxiety in and of itself, but I have a whole other grab-bag of problems that have all already conspired to eff with me. I don’t know that my overloaded brain could have handled accepting this crap as well. But anyway, anxiety. Bad. Always. I used to bawl in class, outside of class, on the way home from school, if I got anything less than an A on a test. The day I got a ZERO on an Advanced Mathematics test in the fifth grade I hyperventilated so badly that I think my father avoided me for hours after I returned home, not because he was angry, but because HE was scared of ME and what my weird, crazy, totally unhealthy reaction would be. I’ve put myself in the emergency room with panic attacks like three times, I’ve cried over minor mistakes at work, and I’ve spilled boiling-hot tea over myself because my hands were shaking too badly to properly hold the cup. I have the scar to prove it. I’m ridiculous.

All of that is extremely humiliating to type. But since my last post, there have been a lot, and I mean a LOT of events that have caused major freak-outs on my part and possibly made other people want to slyly inject me with elephant quaaludes to S me TFU. I feel like a ton of major happenings have caused me to face all of the negative feelings I’ve ever had about myself– from my birthday to our big move into a new apartment to quite a few people I love taking major steps in their lives while I’m worried about where the f*%k to find cheap Space Bags for a bunch of unnecessary crap. Can you feel the anxious, readers?

So now I’m sitting here wondering why I typed all of that out. Hm. Well. I…don’t know? I think a part of me just wants a hug and some understanding and for people to tell me that, no, everyone does not hate me and wish ill on me (a thought that I inexplicably and irrationally carry around with me on a daily basis), and that yes, things will eventually get better. Please just don’t tell me to calm the frig down. That’s like telling a 3 year old not to eat the raw chocolate batter. I’ll eat the batter.

I am sure that not baking for OVER A MONTH (!) has contributed to my current state. Boxes and boxes of still-packed items be damned, I am ignoring you in favor of the baking ingredients I miraculously found before anything else (including my toothbrush ;)). Pumpkin cake (because AUTUMN) in a mason jar (because I unpacked those and it sounded cool), let’s be friends.

Pumpkin cake In A Jar (I made two pint-size jars. You could use the same ingredients and fit these into four pint-size jars, but since I like living on the edge I really packed the batter in there)

adapted from Serious Eats

1/3 cup of butter, softened

1/2 cup plus 2 tablespoons white sugar

1/2 cup plus 2 tablespoons brown sugar

2 large eggs

1 cup pumpkin puree

1/3 cup of water

1 1/2 cups of all-purpose flour

1/4 teaspoon of baking powder

1/2 teaspoon of salt

1/2 teaspoon of ground cloves

1/2 teaspoon cinnamon

1 cup chocolate chips, optional and super worth it

Preheat the oven to 325ºF and grease as many jars of varying sizes as you’d like to use. You can basically use any glass jar you have, but I picked pint-sized ones because they’re gigantic and I believe in generous/unrealistic single-serve portions.

Cream the butter by hand or using an electric mixer until fluffy, then add in sugars until smooth. Beat eggs in, one at a time, until fully incorporated. Stir in the pumpkin puree and water, and set aside.

In a large bowl, stir together flour, baking powder, salt and spices. Add dry mixture to the pumpkin mixture, stirring until completely combined. Add in chocolate chips if desired.

I swear I mixed this completely, just wanted to get a picture before my battery died and... I'm an excellent blogger. — I swear I mixed this completely, just wanted to get a picture before my battery died and… I’m an excellent blogger.

Pour batter evenly into jars– and keep lids and rings OFF while baking. The original recipe says to fill jars a bit more than halfway, which I would now agree with, even though I just straight up disobeyed this order when I made mine. So…don’t be alarmed by the pictures. Place either on a baking sheet or directly on oven rack, carefully, and bake for 30 minutes if you’re using tiny jars and 45 minutes if you’re using pint-size jars (use your judgment for sizes in between. For example, start watching 8-ounce jars around the 35-minute mark for doneness).

Remove from oven and let cool. If you’re not eating the cakes right away (or you’re a nice person and want to gift these to a special someone), place a square of wax paper around the top of each cake, then place lids on jars. Otherwise, just have at them mercilessly.

One of these is a blue mason jar. I felt like that needed to be stated.

Thoughts? I mean…fancy! If I were so inclined, I’d certainly make these again, fill them just enough to close them, and ship them off to my favorite people. Expect to see more of this type of dessert here, if you can stomach all of the emo emo emo that will precede it. 😉

Tags cake in a jar, holiday dessert gifts, pumpkin cake

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